Freedom Conference 2017

THE POWER OF THE MIND                  

Just as food is essential to man's growth so also is the mind, the mind controls virtually everything in human life, before the buildings, technology, things we use, see etc came into existence it first existed in the mind, it might even surprise you to know that we actually see, hear with our mind and not with our eyes or ears respectively this is to tell you how powerful the mind can be, research shows how an elephant is been tamed: the elephant from the wired is tied to a rope for a long period, the rope restrict and dictates the movement of the elephant. When the rope is lose off the leg they find out the elephant could not go beyond where the rope allowed when it was still on his leg. What just happened is that the rope has been transferred to its mind even if the rope is physically absent but he sees it in its mind... Wow what a power the mind posses, we must be careful of what we allow in our mind even THE LAW OF LIBERTY states that "...Transformation comes from the Mind." so we must start charting our course in life from our mind because all you are today is a product of your mind have conceived, lastly I will like to give this analogy to buttress how powerful your mind is; in most part of Nigeria mechanics put on dirty cloths because of the nature of the Job also an insane person who walks to and fro the street but you can't say because both are putting on dirty cloths that they are the same the difference is their mind one put on the dirty cloths on purpose while the other put on a dirty cloths because he/she has lost his/her mind. Oh the MIND! What a gift to mankind.

Freedom Conference 2017

Date January 21th

Time 10:00am

Venue De Lord's marvelous, Ivie road

THE 5 LOVE LANGUAGE

WORDS OF AFFIRMATION:

Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.

QUALITY TIME:

In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.

ACT OF SERVICE:

Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter

.RECIEVING OF GIFTS:

 Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures.

PHYSICAL TOUCH:

This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.

HOW TO DISCUSS AND RESOLVE PROBLEMS WITHOUT A FIGHT WITH WOMEN(MEN'S GUIDE)

HOW TO DISCUSS AND RESOLVE PROBLEMS WITHOUT A FIGHT WITH WOMEN(MEN'S GUIDE)

In a relationship there is bound to be challenges, when you and your partner discuss a problem, do you seem to end up further apart than when you started the conversation? If so, you can improve the situation first though, there are different communication styles of men and women and we will deal with it in bits on our subsequent post but,first:
WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT WOMEN IN TALKING CHALLENGES:
women usually prefer to talk out a problem before hearing a solution. In fact sometime talking is the solution. Most women feel better when they can express their feelings and know their man understand them. As a man you need to practice empathetic listening. After listening you may feel you didn't accomplish anything. But often that's all she needs--- a listening ear.
TRY THIS: The next time you discuss a problem with your female partner, resist the urge to give unsolicited advice. Make eye contact, and focus on what she is saying. Nod in agreement. Repeat the gist of what she says to show that you get the point .
Remember, Lead with your ears, follow up with your tongue, and let anger straggle along in the rear
Extract from Awake( jw. Org)

NECESSARY THINGS TO SAY TO YOUR PARTNER

#1 I LOVE YOU (FACT REASSURED)
You should always say I love you to who you love everyday, whether a significant other or not because you won’t be sure when you will be able to say it again. But in a relationship, it is really important to remind them that you love them. They need to know what you still care and that you’d move mountains for them. Everyone needs to feel some love and hearing those three words can make anyone’s day. You just want your partner to know how much they mean to you and you can’t make them think that you love them any less. Tell them you love them everyday!
#2 YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL OR HANDSOME(COMPLIMENT)
Physical attraction isn’t on the top of the list when it comes to a relationship, but it sure is a factor! When you compliment your significant other, they will feel flattered and flattery is great, no matter whom the compliment comes from. It will make their day, I can assure you. Not only should you say that they are hot, but you should also use other phrases such as “you are so beautiful” or “you are so handsome” or “you look so cute” today. You want your partner to know that you still find them attractive and that you still want them. Compliments make it seem like you are falling in love with that person everyday.
#3 APPRECIATE DEEDS (REINFORCERS)
Give them little compliments about the things they do. Compliment the way they cook, the way they play a certain sport, the way the play the guitar. Just compliment something that they are good at .
#4 YOU ARE MY FAVOURITE (MAKING THEM SPECIAL)
When in a relationship, you are significant other should be your best friend and your lover. Because of that person, you feel as if you are complete and that your world wouldn’t go round without them. You want them to know, that of all the people you know, all the friends you have, that they are the one that means the most to you. You want them to feel special. You want them to feel loved. Hey, when you make them feel wanted and loved, they will do the same in return. But just let them know how important they are to you. Everyone loves to be told how important they are to someone.
#5 I RESPECT YOU
There’s nothing more important than respect in a relationship. If you respect him, he respects you. Respect can go a long way because it shows that in your relationship, you guys are equals. No one should be more superior to the other when it comes to a relationship or else it won’t end up well. Respect is always wanted, not only with relationships, but with friendships as well. So, show respect to your significant other. Not only should you show it, but you should also say it. Because saying it and showing it will prove your true intentions and they will appreciate the respect.

IS LOVE ENOUGH IN A RELATIONSHIP (PART1)

"I Love You" is one of the most common phrase people use to express how valuable someone is to them; from parents to kids, kids to their parents, brother to his sister, sister to her brother, from a boy to a girl and a girl to a boy etc. This phrase (I Love you) as powerful as it is, it is also the most abused phrase because people make use of its power to get want they want and the victims comes up with the conclusion that, "Love is complicated". But the truth is, love is not complicated, people are.

Love is the greatest thing in the world and all we need is love. Love help us relate, learn, and care for others genuinely.

In a relationship love is paramount! It is what will motivate you to go all out and learn all that you need to learn; the key ingredients to spice up your relationship. Eg: care, respect, communication, trust, understanding...etc Love should enable you effortlessly work out every details needed to keep the relationship as listed above. You need to understand that that love won't be enough if those other ingredients are not present because they are vital.

Though love might sustain the relationship for a while based on tolerance, its all  going to change if those ingredients are not learnt in the period of tolerance. I personally don't see why we won't want communicate with the ones we love. Anyways, love will not be love if it doesn't stir us to learn, use and master the right tools to keep our relationship going. It sounds crazy, right? Don't get us wrong; loving someone, or caring deeply for them is an awesome thing but it is sometimes not enough without those little things to spice it up.

We hear from many people who tell us about unhealthy behaviours or feelings of unhappiness in their relationship but still say they love their partners. It is very possible to have feelings of love for someone even though they keep mistreating you.

Love can be a great feeling but its important to recognize that, love is just one part of a whole. There are other ingredients to having a solid and healthy relationship. Therefore, if you are in a relationship and wondering if love is enough, then try asking yourself this questions; do you trust each other?

You can love someone but if you don't trust them or they don't you, then the relationship won't be healthy. Trust is the building block of a healthy relationship and this trust is built overtime together with the other ingredients.

Compiled by freedom empowered blog
Edited by James Jamine ( thanks to you sir)

RESOLVING CONFLICTS (part 3)

Dealing With Conflict

Since no two families are the same, no two people will get along perfectly.
Coming to a relationship from your unique family system insures you will have difference with your partner. Unless you clone yourself, you will be in a relationship with someone who thinks, feels, and act differently.
Both partners must understand each other family background, environment because it plays a vital role in a relationship, if each partner can't compromise each other background resolving conflict will be extremely difficult and that can lead to relationship mismanagement or conflict . 
These are some tips that can help when resolving conflicts..

1 Both partner must first admit a problem exist, if not the problem can't be resolved.

2  Make conflict resolution the priority rather than winning or being right.

3  Focus on the present and not the past.

4  Pick your battles.

5  Be willing to forgive and move on.

6  Know when to let something go.

RELATIONSHIP CONFLICT RESOLUTION (part 2).

Conflict Resolution in Healthy Relationships

In a healthy relationship, communication is key. When you communicate effectively, you understand your partner better and make your relationship stronger. When you can resolve conflicts successfully, you are developing a healthy, mature relationship.

While conflict is normal, it can also be a sign that parts of your relationship aren’t working. If your conflict is based on what friends to hang out with or who should do the dishes, then use the tips below to help resolve these arguments in a healthy way:

Set boundaries. 

Everyone deserves to be treated with respect — even during an argument. If your partner curses at you, calls you names or ridicules you, tell them to stop. If they don’t, walk away and tell them that you don’t want to continue arguing right now.Find the Real Issue. Typically, arguments happen when one partner’s wants are not being met. Try to get to the heart of the matter. If your partner seems needy, maybe they are just feeling insecure and need your encouragement. If you’re angry that your partner isn’t taking out the trash, maybe you’re really upset because you feel like you do all the work around the house. Learn to talk about the real issue so you can avoid constant fighting.Agree to Disagree. If you and your partner can’t resolve an issue, sometimes it’s best to drop it. You can’t agree on everything. Focus on what matters. If the issue is too important for you to drop and you can’t agree to disagree, then maybe you’re not really compatible.

Compromise When Possible. 

Easy to say but hard to do, compromising is a major part of conflict resolution and any successful relationship. So your partner wants to visit the cinema and you feel you should watch a soccer match?  Compromise and visit Cinema tonight, but soccer next time out. Find a middle ground that can allow both of you to feel satisfied with the outcome.Consider Everything. Is this issue really important? Does it change how the two of you feel about each other? Are you compromising your beliefs or morals? If yes, it’s important that you really stress your position. If not, maybe this is a time for compromise. Also, consider your partner’s arguments. Why are they upset? What does the issue look like from their point of view? It is unusual for your partner to get this upset? Does your partner usually compromise? Are you being inconsiderate?

Still arguing? If you try these tips but still argue constantly, consider whether the relationship is right for both of you. You both deserve a healthy relationship without constant conflict.

How to resolve conflict part 1

Relationship conflict
There is no such thing as a relationship without conflict. Conflict is a part of life, it exists as a reality of any relationship, and is not necessarily bad, in fact a relationship with no apparent conflict may be unhealthier than one with frequent conflict.
Conflicts are critical events that can weaken or strengthen a relationship. Conflicts can be productive, creating deeper understanding, closeness and respect or they can be destructive.

How the conflicts get resolved, not how many occur, is the critical factors in determining weather a relationship will be healthy or unhealthy.

A better way of managing a conflict is by,

Having a discussion to understand both sides of the problem.

Clarify to each other exactly what the conflicts or problem entails.

This is the most important and initial stage where both individual hears each other side of the conflict.